For many married couples, falling in love and saying “I do” was the easy part. Living happily ever after is the part that takes a whole lot of work — they know that the real relationship begins when the honeymoon is over.
Couples these days are savvy with a multitude of information at their fingertips, but one thing they will tell you is that they too learn by experience — trial and error.
Don’t drive yourself crazy, when your friends talk about all the awesome sex they’re having, it can be tempting to compare your own sex life. What’s normal? However, marriage therapists say ‘normal’ is different for everyone, but more isn’t better: Research shows that the happiest couples have sex just once a week.
According to The Secret Lives of Wives by Iris Krasnow, each person is entitled to the “secrets that aren’t hurting anyone else.” For example, sometimes secrets are more about having privacy, and when we’re around someone 24/7, there are bound to be a few things that may be better left unsaid.
According to one study, delaying marriage not only means women are enjoying a higher socioeconomic status, but those who marry later also tend to have a lower divorce rate.
May sound rather drastic, but one study says that couples who sleep in separate beds may see some relationship improvement. Some people even opt to live in different houses — sometimes due to logistical issues and sometimes by choice.
A study by Headwater Holidays says that couples who take two vacations per year are happiest. Obviously, vacations are always amazing — but for couples, they’re even better. And 55 per cent claim they are more likely to make time for each other on holiday than at any other time of the year.
According to a study in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, researchers found that people who placed an emphasis on the friendship aspect of their relationship were happier and — yes — more sexually satisfied.
A survey reveals that 42 per cent of couples who have joint accounts also keep separate ones. It’s more for independence and convenience — especially in an emergency. You’ll never have to hear, “You bought what with my money!?” again.
Why not go for a dancing class together? It promotes intimacy, communication and pheromones. Worried you’ve got no rhythm? Don’t worry — laughter never hurt anyone, either.
One good, old-fashioned quibble is a good thing, according to one study. Just remember to say you’re sorry, because that’s also key to success.
Couples need to balance their time together and apart, say marriage counsellors. It’s good for couples to take alone time a step farther, know that it’s healthy (and common!) for couples to vacation separately.