happily married

Kiss Each Other Every Day
A US study shows that couples who kiss frequently argued less, felt more connected and were happier and healthier than those who didn’t. “Just a five-second smooch is enough to keep the happy hormones flowing. During a kiss, our bodies produce dopamine, which is responsible for a rush of elation and craving and can also result in obsessive thoughts that we experience with a new romance,” says Fiona Herbert, a psychotherapist and counsellor at Alliance Professional Counselling LLP.

Mind Your Language
Unfortunately as time goes by, it becomes all too easy to forget your manners and use critical and judgmental words such as “never” and “always”, which only serve to widen the gap between the couple and lead to a vicious cycle of criticism and defensiveness. “Introduce a sensitive topic at a time when both parties are calm, and label the behaviour with constructive examples and then explain how it impacts you, without name calling or derogatory comments,” advises Fiona.

Remember Why You Fell In Love
A recent US study found that couples who share laughs and actively reminisce about the good times they’d shared tend to stay together longer and are more satisfied with their relationship. “Positive memories help to connect a couple emotionally and reinforce differing aspects of each partners’ personality,” says Fiona, who explains that remembering the various sides to your partner can also ease tension in times of conflict.

Try New Things Together
“Do things together that are fun and rewarding, such as taking up new hobbies like cycling or dancing. This helps the couple strip back their various roles as mother or father or employee, and just be a date for the period. It also allows each spouse to see each other in a different light and share a communal experience,” says Fiona.

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