Share A Secret: I feel fat and ugly after finding out my husband has been surfing porn sites

The Weekly's readers share their most well-kept and intimate secrets

Share A Secret: “I saw something I shouldn’t have on my husband’s computer”
First of all, I’m not the kind of woman who snoops into their husband’s phone, or checks his messages. We’ve been married for 15 years and I trust Paul*… well, I used to trust him more than I do now. Because a few months ago he was working in his study and I went in to ask if he wanted another cup of tea; he loves to drink tea while he works. But when I went in I realised he was in the toilet – we have an ensuite.

I do not snoop usually, but as I was picking up the half-empty teacup beside his mouse I saw a few tabs at the top of the computer screen. I couldn’t stop myself opening a few… but I wish I hadn’t. They were nearly all porn sites, or those sites where you pay to have a “live chat” with slutty-looking naked women from places like Thailand or Russia. Several even had messages like “welcome back!” So I knew he had been visiting them more than once!

Then I heard the toilet flush and I quickly shut the tabs. When Paul walked out of the toilet I was leaving the room, holding the cup. I hid my face and muttered about tea and I didn’t think he suspected anything.