After the initial honeymoon period wears off it can be tough to keep the spark alive in a relationship. Reality soon sees the inevitable Uggs and joggers creeping out of the wardrobe and before you know it you are turning in much earlier than you used to. If warning bells start ringing, don’t be afraid to act on your feelings.
2. Hoping to get caught
Rather than taking the respectful upper hand, many choose cheating as a way to end the relationship. Either they do it carelessly in the hope of getting caught and dumped or they do it knowing they’ll have to own up…and presumably get dumped. Either way it’s win win for the cheater.
3. It is all about revenge
This eye for an eye tactic is favoured as an excuse when there’s extensive hurt and blame in the relationship. Either the cheater is getting back at the other for a past affair or is using extra marital sex to punish them other for bad behaviour.
4. Risk taking behaviour
Just as a cliff diver risks snapping his neck on a protruding rock, thrill seeking cheaters crave the adrenalin rush that sneaking around gives them. Even though they may know it is wrong, the thrill of such a risk can be hard to resists for some.
5. Being intoxicated
“I don’t remember”… “it wasn’t me”… “he/she took advantage of me”- these are all common lines, but would this defence stand up in court? The divorce courts maybe.
6. Ego Boost
This reason for cheating is often demonstrated during times of neglect. Everyone likes to feel wanted and attractive to their partner, but if the sex dwindles and egos are dented, the result can be finding someone who’ll replace that missing confidence.
7. Your partner lets you
Well, let’s rephrase-your partner forgives you. While forgiving a past affair can be commended, often it sends the cheating partner a destructive message: ‘please feel free to do it again; I’ll still be here’.
8. Asserting power and independence
As you (hopefully) grow together, it’s common in a relationship to lose a sense of who you are. While a weekend drinking sesh, or a course in crocheting might do it for some, others use the sinister art of cheating to regain their independence and control.
9. Being mistreated
Feeling trapped in a bad relationship isn’t healthy for anyone. If people don’t get the love and respect they crave at home, it’s understandable they might find it elsewhere, whether they’re looking or not.