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Wellness

The Secret Clues That Someone You Love Is Dangerously Depressed

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Wellness

The Secret Clues That Someone You Love Is Dangerously Depressed

October 10, 2019

Depression can show itself in many different ways: Feeling sad or blank for days at a time, being dead tired and not taking joy from favourite pastimes are classic signs.

But depression can also reveal itself in unusual ways. Especially in stressful times like these, when the world economy seems stagnant and the future is far from clear.

These are clues to watch for in the people you love – and in yourself.

If you spot these eight symptoms, approach the person gently, and talk to a professional therapist or doctor about getting a diagnosis and formulating solutions that work for you.

WATCH THIS VIDEO TOO

Depressed As A Child, Cheryl Tan Now Wants To Help People Talk About Their Mental Health

 

Text: Ellen Whyte / Additional Reporting: Tara Barker, Sean Tan; Photo: Unsplash

Therapist Ellen Whyte lives in Malaysia. As well as face-to-face therapy, she counsels clients via email, Skype and Facetime. Occasionally she offers a free online public access agony aunt service over at her blog.

READ MORE:
6 Ways To Spot Suicide Warning Signs In Children
10 Ways To Look After Your Mental Health At Work So You Don’t Burn Out
Top 10 Foods To Boost Your Mood And Brain Power This World Mental Health Day

https://www.womensweekly.com.sg/gallery/beauty-and-health/wellness/6-secret-signs-your-family-members-are-bullying-your-husband/
The Secret Clues That Someone You Love Is Dangerously Depressed
Clue #1: Ragged nails and messy hair
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Uncombed hair, smelly skin, ragged fingernails – it might look like a person is just being careless or disrespectful, but depression can also cause self-neglect. So if someone used to be clean and tidy but now they live in unhygienic surroundings or don’t eat properly it can be a clue that they’re clinically depressed.

Photo: Unsplash
Clue #2: Sudden anger
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We often assume a depressed person is withdrawn and quiet. But sadness can sometimes surface as rage. Typically, it’s a rapid angry reaction that’s unreasonable and out of proportion. It’s happens when feelings of guilt, rejection and loss get so bottled up that they erupt as sudden anger – watch for it especially if stress as well as depression are involved.

READ MORE: 10 Ways To Look After Your Mental Health At Work So You Don’t Burn Out

Photo: Pixabay
Clue #3: Working way too much
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Faced with intense dark feelings, some people try to avoid these emotions. They might sleep too much, take drugs, or drink too much, but some bury themselves in work. The problem with this symptom is that we often perceive working long hours as being ambitious or trying to provide for a family. So look for other clues: Does this behaviour typically seem more like a compulsion? Perhaps he’s clearly exhausted yet he’s up every night trying to finish that report? Or she escapes into her email inbox the second you try to talk to her about her worries.

READ MORE: 57% Of Singaporeans Feel Guilty For Taking Breaks — Here’s Why You Shouldn’t

Photo: 123RF
Clue #4: Forgetting ordinary tasks
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Depression can make it very hard to concentrate – depressed people tend to forget all kinds of weird things, from leaving their keys in the fridge to leaving the milk out in the hall again. Or they may often forget appointments or constantly be late.

Forgetting things is a tricky depression symptom to spot because stress can also make people forgetful – it’s like the brain is just too “full” with worry to remember much. So look for other clues as well, like….

Photo: Unsplash
Clue #5: Not being able to make even small decisions
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Depression can go hand-in-hand with hopelessness. People get the idea that no matter what they do, it will all go wrong. Victims of depression get wrapped up in thoughts of the bad things to come, that they become unable to make even a tiny decision.

Shall I get out of bed? What to have for breakfast? What shall I wear?… it’s all too much. They become apathetic and almost paralysed by indecision. You can go out to work and come back hours later… and they’re still in bed.

Photo: Pixabay
Clue #6: Too much partying
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Dancing on the tables can just be high spirits, but it can also be a form of distraction. If you don’t want to face your dark feelings or you’re frightened of feeling “numb”, it’s tempting to distract yourself by drinking too much or burying yourself in frantic activity. But instead of going out feeling like fun, it feels like desperation, and there’s an undercurrent of hopelessness.

Photo: Unsplash
Clue #7: Physical aches and pains
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While depression is a psychological condition, it can sometimes manifest in a person’s physical body too as aches and pains. These red flags can range from backaches and headaches to digestive issues and stomach cramps. So don’t be too quick to dismiss your loved one’s complains of physical pain, as they could be rooted in mental distress.

Photo: 123RF
Clue #8: Dramatic weight changes
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We’re talking a substantial amount of weight lost or gained within a short amount of time. One of the side effects of depression is linked to one’s appetite, so a depressed person may suddenly start bingeing on food or lose their appetite entirely, leading to rapid changes in weight.

Here’s a list of helplines:

Samaritans of Singapore (SOS): 1800–221 4444 (24 hours)
Youth Line: 6336 3434 (Monday to Friday, 8.30am to 6pm)
Tinkle Friend (for primary schoolers): 1800 2744 4788 (Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 11.30am, and 2.30pm to 5pm)
Metoyou Cyber Counselling: 6445 0100 (Monday to Friday, 2pm to 6pm)
Institute of Mental Health: 6389 2222 (24 hours)

READ MORE:
5 Simple Rituals That Will Protect Your Mental Health, According To A Psychologist
Jeon Mi-seon, Jonghyun & Other Korean Celebrities Who We Tragically Lost To Depression
Real Life: “I Thought I Could Do Everything, But I Couldn’t Save My Son From Depression”

Photo: 123RF
  • TAGS:
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  • Health
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  • mental health
  • mental illness
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