Every marriage has its own set of problems now and then. And it’s important to look at your own behaviour first when the going gets tough, instead of immediately putting the blame on your significant other. Hence, experts reveal some common habits that may be damaging your relationship.
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If you’ve slipped into the bad habit of making excuses about why sex has dwindled or is non-existent, your marriage may be headed for trouble.
Not in the mood? Your attitude towards your spouse may be the problem. If you are constantly fighting, criticising and spouting negativity, you can’t be close.
Gretchen Rubin, author of the bestseller, The Happiness Project, advises, “Try concentrating for a month on all the things you love about your husband. Decide to say ‘yes’ a lot more often than you say ‘no’ when he initiates sex.”
READ MORE: Stop Saying NO To Sex
There’s no such thing as a perfect person, so don’t expect unrealistic changes. Reminding him or her to make the bed is one thing, but trying to radically change shyness or anxiety is another—and you could be ignoring the underlying causes for those issues in the first place.
Doubting your partner may be a symptom of a larger problem which deals with insercurity. And women who feel insecure in their relationships may be at greater risk for health issues like a weakened immune system. Some advice for reducing envy, at least temporarily? Stay off Facebook and other social networking sites.
Always remember why you love that special someone. Showing gratitude and paying attention to that person by your side will only make the relationship stronger.
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Not feeling confident in a relationship can really do some damage: Low self-esteem is sometimes linked to low sex drive, which could make things less heated in the bedroom. Getting active, setting goals, and even smiling can improve how you feel about yourself. But don’t forget that an unhealthy relationship can actually cause low-self esteem, so steer clear of someone who makes you feel less than great.
Everyone needs some alone time (yep, even hopelessly devoted couples). Solitude may even enhance relationships, making time together more valuable.
No relationship is perfect. So don’t create unnecessary drama in every scenario. If your spouse forgets to take out the garbage, or wipe the dishes, there’s no need for a scene. Take a breather and address the problem calmly.
READ MORE: 10 Things All Successful Marriages Have
People make mistakes, and holding on to them may not only hurt a relationship—it could also cause unwanted stress and anxiety. Learn to forgive, forget and move on.
If something is wrong, the other person probably can’t read your mind. When a problem comes up, speak up at the right time. One study suggests young couples are less stressed when they talk out their issues than when they keep their feelings bottled up. And don’t forget to say, “I love you.” Expressing emotions—positive and negative—can benefit that bond.
Sure, relationships should be about give and take, but don’t keep track of every little detail (For example: I paid for the last six dinners, and you only paid for five!). It can cause unnecessary tension.
READ MORE: 10 Ways To Keep Your Marriage Strong
Text: Bauer/ Additional Reporting: Shenielle Aloysis