You’re back at work after maternity leave, but your heart is with your baby and you’re feeling guilty.
Yet, you know that quitting your job is not an option because you have a house to pay for!
Rather than feeling sad that you can’t be with your little one all the time, stay focused, get your work done and get out of the office early, says child psychologist Dr. Richard C. Woolfson.
So stop beating yourself up, and keep these five things in mind to keep your spirits up:
When choosing an infant care centre for your young child, check out all possibilities very carefully. Ask about the activities provided for infants that age, and also about record-keeping and parent reports.
Although you’ll still miss your baby very much during working hours, you’ll feel reassured that she benefits from high-quality care during your absence.
If your baby is cared for by a maid, the same applies – make sure you are happy with the standard of care provided.
Yes, it would be wonderful to have that long lie in bed during weekends and holidays. After all, you deserve a rest after the long working week.
But time is a precious commodity for you and your baby. That’s why you need to ensure you all go out together as a family, whether it’s a shopping trip to the mall or a stroll in her buggy in the park.
These joint activities, with you, your husband and your child, strengthen family relationships and help your little one feel loved, safe and secure. That compensates for the time you spend away from them.
The emotional bond that you have with your little one is the main influence on her psychological development.
As a working mum, you are just as able as any non-working mother to foster that bond, as long as you tune into their feelings, moods and activities.
Get to know their emotions by cuddling, paying close attention to her facial expressions, cries, body language and respond appropriately, so that they know you understand them.
The more loved they feels, the more they will thrive psychologically.
Everyone is different, and what suits one baby might not suit another. You need to watch their progress very carefully.
Check that he or she receives suitable stimulation and encouragement, and observe how she responds to them; don’t take anything for granted.
If you see a gap – for example, if you think your baby doesn’t hear enough songs or nursery rhymes – tell your caregiver to amend her daily schedule.
Of course, you’ll still miss them when you are at work, but you can relax knowing they are developing well.
Instead of focusing on the time you and baby are apart, concentrate on making the most of the time you have together.
Naturally, you’ll be exhausted at the end of a long day. But make a deliberate plan to spend time playing, talking, feeding and changing her.
Remember that what matters is not the amount of time you spend with your baby, but the quality.
(Text By Dr. Richard C. Woolfson for Young Parents / Additional Reporting By Natalya Molok)