One of the biggest challenges I have faced as a working mother is meeting societal expectations. My children’s school always calls me first when my kids are sick just because the norm is that the mother is always the primary caregiver. However, my husband spends just as much time or even more time with my children.
Being a working mum means I have to balance work responsibilities with caregiving responsibilities, which means I cannot always be there as the primary caregiver.
However, I recognise that every family’s situation is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting. For me, I am very fortunate to have a partner who’s as hands-on as myself with the kids. That gives me peace of mind to know that when I’m not there, my kids are in good hands!
Simply put, to me, it’s never just about motherhood, but parenthood. It always takes two to solve a problem together and make things work for the family. This partnership requires constant discussion and communication between husband and wife. At the same time, we have to constantly re-evaluate our priorities and adjust our schedules accordingly to ensure that our children’s needs are not compromised in the process.
Some working parents feel that they are treated differently from staff who are non-parents. Have you experienced this?
My experience is that most people are very accommodating to working parents and we are generally well-supported. However, sometimes working parents may feel guilty and hesitant to ask for help.
I remember a dear colleague of mine exclaiming: “I know I don’t have children, but I have a life as well,” when I asked her for help. It was at that moment that it dawned on me how it may have been seemingly unfair when other colleagues (who don’t have children or are not married) have to step in and take on more just to help me (or other parents) out.
Therefore, it is important for a corporation to instill a more holistic view when it comes to workload management and to send the right message to all its employees.
