The practice of giving ang bao (red packets) is prevalent among Chinese communities all over the world. It is given to children and unmarried people to wish them luck for the Chinese New Year.
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While ang bao-giving etiquette is usually honed by observing what our elders did, it can sometimes be a confusing, overwhelming and frustrating process as you ponder how much to give, who to give to and what to do if you receive one.
So, to take the stress out of the upcoming Chinese New Year festivities, we’re answering some questions you may have about these lucky little red packets:
In 2015, The Straits Times Life published a story on the ang bao going rate. It was then $8 per packet, according to an online survey by the United Overseas Bank of 500 people and an informal poll conducted by the paper.
Dr Lim Lee Ching, vice-dean at the School of Human Development & Social Services at SIM University, says there is “no rule” in terms of the amount to put into an ang bao.
“Giving ang bao is a gesture and not a transaction, although many Singaporeans seem to think otherwise,” he says.
Dr Kang Ger-Wen, course chair for Chinese Studies in Ngee Ann Polytechnic’s School of Humanities & Social Science, agrees with Dr Lim that there is no fixed amount for ang bao as it symbolises a blessing in Chinese tradition.
He also feels that the amount for a family member versus, say, a colleague’s child, should be different.
“Because in Chinese tradition, especially in Confucianism, love to a close family member and to a friend should be different,” he explains.
Dr Lim says this is “often a source of awkwardness”.
He has experienced such awkwardness, as he is single and sometimes still receives ang bao from younger friends or relatives.
Personal experience aside, he says there is “no etiquette” to this.
“It is up to the receiver, really,” he says.
Ang bao are traditionally handed out by married couples to their parents, single adults and children during the Chinese New Year celebrations as tokens of good fortune and blessing.
For newlyweds, experts say the giving of ang bao should be within the couple’s means, and not become a source of financial stress.
“It’s really up to their own comfort level,” says Dr Lim.
He adds that there is also a convention that newlyweds do not give ang bao in the first year of marriage.
Dr Lim says there are no set rules for this, as it is entirely up to both the giver and receiver, as well as the nature of the relationship.
“For example, between an elderly relative and a favourite grown-up niece, the giving of an ang bao may be a symbol of the closeness they share,” he says.
Yes, says Dr Kang.
“In Chinese tradition, even numbers are preferred, as good things come in pairs.”
Both experts agree that it is rude to do so.
Adds Dr Lim: “But children will always want to, and get chastised by their parents for doing so – all in the name of festive cheer.”
A lot of people go away on holiday during Chinese New Year, but make no mistake, even if you’re gone until March, you will not escape giving out ang bao the first time you see people in the new year.
People will remember and it’s just tacky to try to avoid it.
Always receive your ang bao packet with both hands. Never accept a red packet with just one hand.
Prepare varying cash amounts in differently designed ang bao in advance, so that you can quickly and gracefully discern whether you’re giving away $20 or $200.
Never use white envelopes as they are usually given to bereaved families during funerals.
It’s tradition to do so, and you will get bonus points if you clasp your hands together in front of your chest and shake them up and down gently while you say your Chinese New Year greetings. Here are some popular ones:
Gong Xi Fa Cai: “Wish you wealth and prosperity”
Cai Yuan Gun Gun: “May wealth come pouring in”
Shi Ye Fa Da: “May your career to take off”
Xin Xiang Shi Cheng: “May all your wishes come true”
Shen Ti Jian Kang: “Wish you good health”
Newly-married couples are often told to give out two ang baos when giving out red packets but experts say this is just a trend that’s emerged over the past 10 years because of the popularity of Hong Kong dramas on TV.
While it its true that families with Cantonese lineage do give out double ang baos, it’s not necessary to do so if your lineage is different.
While most people are happy either way, it is a nice gesture to go to the bank and get crisp new banknotes to put in your ang bao as it signifies new beginnings. Giving out dirty or wrinkled bank notes is thought to be in bad taste.
Also, it’s best to try and avoid giving coins in your ang bao or else you’ll quickly gain a reputation as being old-fashioned and a little bit cheapo (unless of course the amount is $100.10 heehee).
DBS is bringing back its loadable QR Ang Bao this Lunar New Year, which retains the tradition of exchanging physical Ang Baos while eliminating the use of cash.
Via the new QR Ang Bao system, DBS PayLah! users will be able to ‘load’ a desired cash value onto unique QR codes, and recipients would then simply need to scan the QR code to have the value immediately transferred to their PayLah! accounts.
Skip the queue for new notes, and surprise your loved ones with a new way of gifting ang baos! Find out more here.
(Text: Bryna Singh, Straits Times / Additional Reporting: Natalya Molok)
This post was updated on January 23, 2020.