Initiating sex can be awkward. If you try too hard or don’t put enough effort into it, you might just kill the mood with your partner, and getting that mood back can be hard. Sometimes trying to initiate sex can also lead to misunderstandings and feelings of rejection.
We asked five women the fun and most interesting ways they’ve tried initiating sex with their partner.
We know this doesn’t sound very ~interesting~ when we’re putting it this way but according to *Michelle, it’s all in how you do it.
“If we’re watching TV, I usually start by stroking his inner thigh and arms really gently with my hands. When stroking him, I sometimes get really close to his penis and I know this sets him off. If he responds positively by touching me back, I know he’s in the mood for it and I’ll usually go on the charm offensive by wrapping my arms around him or straddle him before we start to make out,” she shares. “This usually leads to him carrying me off to the bedroom or we’ll end up having sex on the couch itself.” A literal Netflix and chill sesh!
*Anna takes a leaf out of a How I Met Your Mother character and does the naked man, or in her case, the naked woman.
“If I’m in the mood for sex, I make sure i’m in his line of view when getting changed. I know he gets turned on when he sees me getting undressed or even just taking my bra off to feel a little more ‘comfortable’ at home. Many times this has worked for me and if I’m already naked, it saves us a lot of time!”
“All I have to do is say ‘it’s time’ and he’ll be naked in 0.0001 seconds,” says *Cath. Obviously, this comes with knowing your partner’s libido well enough to know if they’ll be in the mood for sex. “I’ve personally never felt like he wasn’t in the mood,” she explains.
However, knowing when to strike could make initiating easier. Cath shares that she usually does this at night or when it’s a slow day in the home office as the couple both work from home.
*Julie prefers surprising her partner on occasions. “I like coming up to him from behind when he’s playing a video game on his PC or when he’s just about done with cooking. I like kissing him on his neck and ears while lovingly wrapping my arms around his body,” she explains. “He’ll get the hint that I want sex and if he’s not in the mood for it at that time, he’ll either let me down easy or explain why. The good thing is though, he’ll try initiating later on because he knew I was trying!”
Men are visual creatures so it’s no surprise that this works. “If he’s in a different room of the house while I’m in the bedroom, I’ll send him a naughty text to show him what I’m wearing. He’ll automatically come into the bedroom to have a look!” says *Kylie. “If he’s at work or out in public though, just make sure to send an NSFW message beforehand so he knows to avoid opening the text publicly!”
*Names have been changed
Text: Atika Lim/Cleo