Honestly after a while nothing you see or hear feels weird. Off the top off my head:

• A guy returning to the reception to collect his penis pump that accommodation staff had collected.
• A guy stabbing another dude in front of the golf clubhouse.
• Traveller weddings were probably the weirdest thing to witness in all honesty.

In the hotel I worked in? One, but he had a heart attack. There was another hotel nearby that had a high-suicide rate in bedrooms.

Very rare. It gets reported a lot, then a special company are called in to test if there is bed bugs. I worked in fairly well established hotels so it was never really an issue.

Regarding the towels, not really. If a hotel doesn’t have an in-house laundry room, the towels are rented so you are roughly stealing something worth less than dollar. It all adds up but these things are built into hotel room prices.

It’s pretty impossible to prove if someone stole one or not, never came across someone who cared enough to investigate.

• If you have an issue, the nicer you are the more you will get back/be looked after.
• You can easily haggle on the room rates.
• If you have a food issue and there is nothing wrong with the dish, the person you complained to is going to get yelled at by the chef.
• Most waiters and waitresses will probably automatically dislike you if you’re a vegan.
• If you leave a negative online review somewhere, never list a worker’s name. Most people feel down when they read a negative review about themselves and hotels always read the negative reviews at management meetings.

Walking into a room covered in blood and vomit.

You can either be super nice and say it is a special occasion, or be a pain in the ass.

If a pain in the ass needed to be upgraded, I’d choose a room with either poor wifi or where something happened that week in the room, like smoking in a room when the guest specified a non-smoking room, or a room where the TV or phone is broken (it is worth it when the guest comes back down 3-5 floors really pissed!).

Probably your dishes and cutlery, and, depending on the establishment, cups and glassware. If you want to tell how much attention to detail hotels cleaning staff do, check the top of picture frames for dust.

(Text by Ellie Mcdonald, bauersyndication.com.au / Additional reporting by Natalya Molok)