The loss of a child through miscarriage is never easy. Just like Chrissy Teigen‘s recent Instagram post reflecting on the loss of her son, Jack, YES 93.3FM DJ Lim Peifen has also opened up about her painful experience on the social media platform last December.

Peifen started off the post by saying that she is “sharing this now because I’m ready to, and because when it happened to me, I found strength in women with similar stories”. She then wrote about her miscarriage that took place in November 2019, mentioning that she and her husband, computer engineer Lie Wei Xiang, “had been trying for a second baby for two years”. They have a son Luke who’s five.

“At eight weeks, I had seen my baby and heard its heartbeat. I was elated,” said Peifen. “Then, at 11 weeks, just a day shy of my next gynae appointment, I discovered, to my greatest fear and dismay, that I was bleeding. We rushed to the gynae, he did a scan and there was no heartbeat. The foetus had failed to grow for two weeks. In a flash, all our joy and hope was gone.”

She also documented the range of emotions that she felt during the period, such as “grief like never before” and “shock, then anger, and then sorrow”.

Aside from having to deal with the heartbreak of losing a child, she had to endure a great amount of physical pain, as her body did not expel the foetus fully. This meant that she had to take pills to expedite the process, which in turn led to painful cramps and more bleeding.

However, even in her darkest times, she managed to find consolation in a message that her friend sent her that said: “To think, the first thing you saw when you opened your tiny little eyes was the face of Jesus.”

She ended off the post on an encouraging note: “If you are going through or have been through something similar, please know that you are not alone. And it is nothing to be ashamed of. And you can grief. And you can cry (or not). And you will find solace. And when you can finally see light through the tears, you will be stronger, better, kinder.”

Peifen recently gave birth to her second child. She explained in her post: “Jude is my rainbow baby. I chose the name because Saint Jude is the patron saint of hope, and Jude is my hope.”

Text: Melissa Teo and Kwok Kar Peng/AsiaOne