My Mum Supported Me Through Postpartum Depression While Battling Lupus

Daphne grew up in a single-parent family as the youngest of three children. Her father died of cancer when she was still young, leaving her to experience a painful loss at an early age.

After his passing, the responsibility of raising the family fell entirely on her mother, Madam Lee, now 69. As a teenager, Daphne could not fully understand the sacrifices her mother was making. Back then, she mostly saw her mum as strict.

Today, Daphne is 33 and a mum of two — a two-year-old son and a three-month-old daughter. It is only now, after experiencing the sleepless nights and emotional weight of motherhood, that she understands just how much strength her mother must have needed. Madam Lee was grieving the loss of her husband while raising three children on her own.

Looking back, Daphne is most grateful that despite their modest circumstances, her mother always did what she could to give her children the best. She also remembers how deeply her parents loved each other before her father’s passing, and how devoted he was as a father. Those memories shaped her understanding of marriage and parenting from a young age: that marriage requires appreciation and forgiveness, while raising children calls for love and patience.

To thank her mother for years of love and quiet sacrifice, Daphne shared their story in the Parents’ Day social media campaign jointly organised by Nuyou Singapore and The Singapore Women’s Weekly, in collaboration with Holistic Way (Singapore’s No. 1 Health Supplement Brand*).

The campaign invited participants to share heartfelt stories around the theme of care. Daphne and Madam Lee’s moving entry stood out in the mother-daughter category.

As part of the prize, they received a year’s supply of Holistic Way health supplements worth S$3,000, along with a magazine feature and a professional photoshoot.

But more than a prize, this is Daphne’s tribute and love letter to her mother. Here’s their story of love, growth and gratitude.

How would you describe your mother-daughter relationship?

Daphne: My mum and I have always been very close. We can talk about anything and share everything with each other. When we disagree, we’re honest about it and communicate openly about our different views.

This happens especially when it comes to parenting. We’re from different generations, so it’s natural that we have different opinions. But we usually come to understand each other, because at the end of the day, we both want what’s best for the children.

Madam Lee: We’re very close. Honestly, I can’t think of any big arguments we’ve had. Even if we did quarrel, I’ve forgotten about it because I don’t hold grudges. When we disagree, we simply stop talking for a while. After that, everything goes back to normal.

What’s the most memorable thing you and your mother have done for each other? 

Daphne: My mum is very responsible and family-oriented. She has always put her family first.

After my father passed away, she worked as a hawker, a seamstress and a childcare centre cook. None of these jobs paid much, so she had to budget very carefully to support the family.

When I was young, I would see her feet swelling from standing for long hours while cooking. The hot kitchen would also give her headaches. By the time she finished work, she would be completely exhausted. But she never talked about how hard it was, and she never complained in front of us. She just kept going.

What moves me most is that no matter what difficulties I face, she is always the first person to step in and help. She has never been absent from my life. During both my pregnancies, she took such attentive care of me and made sure that my baby and I were well looked after. Even now, she dotes on my children, and I’m really grateful.

Madam Lee: My daughter is very filial and thoughtful. I still remember that not long after her father passed away, it was Mother’s Day. She was still in secondary school then, but she saved up her pocket money and brought me to a restaurant for a meal.

It wasn’t an expensive dinner, but to me, it was the most precious feast. I could really feel her love and filial piety.

Over the years, I’ve watched her get married, start her own family and now have children of her own. Being able to hold my grandchildren in my arms today fills me with gratitude. Seeing my children live happily is my greatest joy.

How did you support your mum after she was diagnosed with lupus?

Daphne: She was diagnosed with lupus in 2018. When we first found out, our whole family was very worried. We didn’t really understand the illness, and we didn’t know how serious it might become.

After she fell ill, my mum often had extreme dry mouth and difficulty swallowing. She couldn’t taste food properly, lost her appetite and lost a lot of weight. Sometimes, even when she couldn’t eat, she still had to force herself to take some food so she wouldn’t get gastric pain.

She also had dry eyes and sensitive skin. Whenever she had a fever or caught a cold, it took her a long time to recover. As she got older, she also developed pain in her waist and feet, probably from years of overwork. She can no longer stand for long periods.

Over the years, I’ve accompanied her for medical check-ups and bought skincare products suitable for her sensitive skin. Sometimes I buy her nice clothes too, just to cheer her up.

I also like to ask my two-year-old son, “Who is the prettiest?” And he will always say, “Grandma is the prettiest!” That always makes her very happy.

But during my pregnancies, I actually became the one who needed her care instead. Watching her take care of me despite her own condition made me truly understand the depth of a mother’s love.

What physical and emotional challenges did you face during pregnancy, and how did your mum support you?

Daphne: I had severe morning sickness, especially during my first pregnancy. In the early stages, I could barely get out of bed to eat. The moment I stood up, I would feel dizzy and nauseous. It was honestly overwhelming. I never expected pregnancy to be that difficult.

My mum was worried that I wasn’t eating enough, so she often cooked for me and brought the food to my bedside to feed me. She kept encouraging me and telling me that this phase would pass soon. She helped me get through that difficult period one step at a time.

During my second pregnancy, I had nausea and dizziness again, and I also experienced bleeding throughout the pregnancy. I was very anxious and scared. My mum stayed with me almost every day and took care of me at home because she was worried I might faint or have an accident if I were alone.

It was an extremely tough time, but I was grateful for the support of my mum, husband, son and relatives. Their presence gave me a deep sense of security and made me realise how precious family love is.

How did you overcome postpartum depression?

Daphne: The hardest part of postpartum depression was having to recover physically while caring for a newborn. At the same time, I became very emotionally sensitive. As a first-time mother, I was completely unprepared.

My body was still very weak after childbirth. I was dealing with postpartum bleeding, fever from breast engorgement and lack of sleep. On top of that, my son had to be induced at 37 weeks because of a small placenta, so I was constantly worried about whether I could take good care of him.

Whenever he cried, I would cry too. I cried over small things every day, overthought everything and often blamed myself for not being good enough. I was completely exhausted, both physically and mentally.

When my mum found out, she would come over after work to help take care of the baby. She even stayed overnight so that we could rest more, then went to work early the next morning. Eventually, she retired early so she could help care for her grandson.

My husband also gave me a lot of support. He helped with childcare, changed diapers and cared for my emotional well-being. Whenever I felt low, he would patiently talk to me, comfort me and remind me that I was doing well. He also made sure to bring me out for walks so I could clear my mind.

With the unconditional love and support of my mum and husband, and with my adorable first son by my side, I slowly came out of postpartum depression and found the courage to welcome my second child.

You’re now a full-time homemaker. What are the ups and downs of making that decision?

Daphne: I used to work in marketing and interior design. Since my children are still young and growing so quickly, I didn’t want to miss any of their milestones, so I decided to focus on my family.

Of course, there are many challenges. We rely only on my husband’s income, so we have to be more frugal. I also have less personal time and space.

But the greatest reward is being able to witness my children grow up, and to spend more time playing and learning with them. My son often tells us that he loves us.

At the same time, I do hope to return to work in the future, so I can share the financial responsibility with my husband. I don’t want him to be so exhausted all the time. I also want him to be able to get proper rest.

How has your mum influenced your approach to life, marriage, health, and parenting?

Daphne: She taught me to be kind, grateful and considerate, and to think before I act. This has stayed with me throughout my life.

Whether it’s in marriage, family or parenting, I remind myself to be less reactive, more patient and more appreciative.

I hope my relationship with my children will be as close as the one I have with my mum — like family, but also like friends who trust each other and share life’s joys and sorrows. She has shown me unconditional love and support, and I hope to pass these values on to my children through love, patience and companionship.

Of course, discipline and boundaries still matter. When my children make mistakes, I will guide and correct them patiently, because building good character is important.

After all your experiences with health challenges, how has your definition of “health” changed?

Daphne: After going through pregnancy, postpartum depression and my mum’s illness, I’ve realised more than ever that physical and mental health are equally important. No amount of money can buy back health.

Now, I take better care of myself and the people around me. I prioritise rest, and I cherish time with my family more than I used to.

Share a message of love that you don’t usually say out loud

Daphne: Thank you, Mum, for always taking such attentive care of me, and for helping me look after my children when I needed it most.

Especially during my second confinement period — when my son had hand, foot and mouth disease, and you yourself were suffering from shingles — you still insisted on helping to care for him. I’m truly grateful, and I’m very lucky to have such a wonderful mother.

Madam Lee: Stay healthy and well, and take good care of my two grandsons. Thank you for always accompanying me to my medical check-ups.

Why did you join the Holistic Way contest?

Daphne: A year’s worth of health supplements sounded very appealing, and I’ve always wanted my mum to take better care of her health. I also want to give the supplements to her — and to my hardworking husband — as a way of thanking them for everything they’ve done for our family over the years.

Besides that, I would love to have a magazine-style photoshoot with my mum, so we can create precious memories together and give her a more meaningful and unforgettable Parents’ Day.

Like Daphne, many busy mothers find themselves caring for their children while also supporting ageing parents. In the midst of looking after everyone else, it is just as important to care for their own health and daily wellness.

Here are two Holistic Way supplements designed to support women’s health and well-being.

Note: The information below is for reference only. If you have any medical conditions, or are pregnant, breastfeeding or taking medication, please consult a doctor before use.

Holistic Way Women’s Probiotic 100 Billion

Specially developed to support women’s needs, Holistic Way Women’s Probiotic 100 Billion contains up to 100 billion active probiotic cultures per serving. It helps support gut and immune health, while also helping to maintain a balanced vaginal microbiome.

The formula includes inulin, a prebiotic that promotes the growth of beneficial bacteria, and is combined with cranberry extract to support urinary tract health.

It is also enriched with aronia berry extract, which is packed with antioxidants and helps support skin health for a naturally radiant complexion.

A healthy gut plays an important role in digestion, nutrient absorption and overall wellness, helping women feel better from the inside out.

Suggested usage: Take one sachet daily before meals, or as directed by a physician.

Holistic Way Deer Placenta 15,000mg

As we age, skin concerns such as dryness, sagging, fine lines, and dullness often become more noticeable. Formulated for mature skin, Holistic Way Deer Placenta 15,000mg combines a range of nourishing ingredients designed to support the skin’s overall condition and help maintain a healthy, radiant appearance.

The formula contains marine collagen, which helps improve skin hydration and elasticity while reducing the appearance of fine lines. Squalene helps deeply moisturise the skin, support the skin barrier and protect against free radical damage.

It is also enriched with evening primrose oil and borage oil, which help nourish the skin, hair and nails, while easing dryness and supporting women through common menopausal concerns.

With continued use, it helps improve skin texture, enhance firmness and elasticity, soften the appearance of fine lines, and support skin renewal — revealing a more confident, graceful beauty at every age.

Holistic Way supports your everyday health

Founded in 2007, JR Life Sciences’ flagship brand Holistic Way is one of Singapore’s leading vitamin and health supplement brands. Offering a wide range of natural health supplements, Holistic Way is committed to helping consumers maintain good health and youthful vitality through quality wellness solutions.

Its extensive product range includes supplements for joint care, eye health, detoxification, skin health and more. Holistic Way supplements are available at major pharmacies and official retail channels islandwide.

*NieIsenIQ RMS 2025

This article is brought to you by Nuyou Singapore and The Singapore Women’s Weekly, in partnership with Holistic Way.

Photographer: Lawrence Teo
Art Director: Paul Soi
Stylist: Donson Chan
Hairstylist: Aaron Ng, Decorum Salon
Makeup: Sveta Klyn, The Suburbs Studio