“We Pity Our Kids”: How This Police Couple Use Their Detective Skills In Parenting

While some parents reserve their professional skills for the workplace, this police couple put their investigative expertise to use outside of work as well.

One school day, Superintendent of Police Michelle Foo Li-Mei and Supt Low Jiing Haur received a call from their daughter’s teacher saying that she had fallen and was complaining of back and stomach pain.

However, this was different from their child’s version of events, as she said she had fallen and hurt her knee.

The couple used their investigative experience to examine the differing accounts. After gently questioning their daughter, Foo realised it was a minor accident and assured the worried teacher that nothing serious had happened.

“We just want to find out what is wrong,” said Michelle, adding that she and her husband emphasise the importance of honesty to their three children.

Jiing Haur had to lay down the law at home when his older son, who was then in upper secondary school, wanted to stay over at his girlfriend’s home.

The officer reminded his son to be respectful of the girl and told him to be home by 10pm.

Trying to suppress his laughter, he said: “I opened the (Singapore) statute and told him to read (the section on underage sex). I showed him the law and said, ‘You cannot do this.’”

Under the law, anyone found guilty of having sex with a minor between the ages of 14 and 16 may face up to 10 years’ jail, as well as a fine and caning.

While on investigative assignments in 2002, the two police officers spent a lot of time getting to know each other. Two years later, they got married and now have three children – two sons aged 19 and 16, and a daughter, 10.

Michelle, 48, and Jiing Haur, 51, have been juggling work and family for the past two decades, but at least one of them will attend their children’s events.

On June 3, the Singapore Police Force (SPF) commemorated Police Day with a parade at the Home Team Academy and paid tribute to officers who have made untold sacrifices to keep Singapore safe.

Low joined SPF in May 1998 and is now a chief investigation officer at the Jurong Police Division.

Foo, who joined SPF in 2001, is head of the anti-scam investigation branch under the Anti-Scam Command at the Commercial Affairs Department.

The pair met at Ang Mo Kio Police Division when Michelle joined as an investigation officer for her foundation posting in late 2001. Although they were in different teams, she needed the help of a male officer for a case and approached Jiing Haur.

She said: “I saw he was working (in the office), so I thought we could go together. Then, in future, when he needs the help of a female officer, I can go with him.”

They worked on other cases after that, and a bond grew between them.

There are days when both Jiing Haur and Michelle are deployed for high-security events such as general elections and the Shangri-La Dialogue, but they credit understanding bosses for supporting their family commitments during such periods.

Jiing Haur has held a wide range of investigative and leadership appointments, including roles in general investigations, violence against persons, and investigation support.

He said: “My bosses are also human, and they have families too. They said, ‘No worries, we will try to stagger the duties’, so that she can be deployed and I can take care of the family at home.”

Michelle was an accounting student at Nanyang Technological University’s Nanyang Business School when she got interested in investigative work. She specialises in white-collar crime and anti-scam operations.

The couple joked that they pity their children for having police investigators as parents, because whenever the children try to cover things up at home or in school, their parents’ investigative skills kick in.

She said: “We probe and probe and probe until the truth comes out. Honesty is definitely valued.”

A version of this article was originally published on The Straits Times.