Does Having Sex During Ovulation Help You Conceive A Boy?

Million-dollar question: Can you improve your chances of having a boy or a girl through natural means of conceiving? We’ve sure heard a lot from couples who have tried various things to influence their baby’s gender  – from timing sexual intercourse to adopting certain sex positions and modifying their diet.

Some theories, like the Shettles method, suggest that the timing of intercourse in relation to ovulation can favour one gender over the other. Others believe that adjusting pH levels or making dietary changes may help create a more favourable environment for either X-carrying or Y-carrying sperm.

But how much of this is science, and how much of it is myth? Here, we break down popular theories shared by parents, and get fertility experts to weigh in.

Theory #1: Have sex before ovulation if you want a girl; have sex during ovulation if you want a boy

PARENTS SAY:

Timing is everything. “I was told that you should have sex before ovulation if you want a girl, and during ovulation if you want a boy,” shares Rebecca Lee, 35, an e-commerce manager with a one-year-old boy. In fact, some say to get a girl, you should have sex every day as soon as your period ends, and stop three days before ovulation. To get a boy, the opposite direction is given: avoid sex until 24 hours before ovulation, and have sex only for up to one or two days after ovulation.

EXPERTS SAY: 

Dr Suresh Nair, founding director of Monash IVF Singapore says: “The belief that you can influence the sex of a baby by timing intercourse relative to ovulation originates from the Shettles method, developed in the 1960s by Dr Landrum B. Shettles. This method posits that male (Y chromosome) sperm are faster but less resilient, while female (X chromosome) sperm are slower but more robust. 

Based on the Shettles method, to conceive a boy, you would engage in intercourse as close to ovulation as possible, allowing the faster Y sperm to reach the egg first. To conceive a girl, you would have intercourse two to four days before ovulation, so that by the time ovulation occurs, the hardier X sperm are more likely to be present.

Some studies have since found no significant correlation between intercourse timing and the baby's gender. For instance, a 1995 study in the New England Journal of Medicine concluded that timing intercourse in relation to ovulation has no influence on the sex of the baby. Given the conflicting evidence and the lack of consistent scientific support, the Shettles method remains controversial. Couples considering this approach should be aware that while it may slightly sway the odds, it does not guarantee the desired outcome. Ultimately, the sex of a baby is determined by complex biological factors beyond the precise timing of intercourse.”

VERDICT: 

Unproven hypothesis. The Shettles method remains a theory due to inconsistent evidence and a lack of scientific support. Still, it shouldn’t really hurt to try!

Theory #2: Abstain from sex for a few days for more boy-producing sperm

Parents say: 

“I heard that in order to have a boy, the guy should abstain from sex for three to four days so that there will be more boy-producing sperm,” Charlotte P., 42, an artiste with two boys, 13 and 16, says. Actually, this particular hearsay seems to operate both ways, because others (some researchers included) believe that sexual abstinence for a few days can marginally increase the girl-producing X chromosome in sperm instead.

Experts say: 

According to Dr Nair, both beliefs lack scientific support.

“Current research does not indicate that the duration of sexual abstinence influences the ratio of X (female) to Y (male) sperm in ejaculate. Studies have examined the effects of ejaculatory abstinence on semen volume and sperm count, as well as sperm motility and morphology. While longer periods of abstinence are associated with increases in semen volume and total sperm count, these increases do not affect the proportion of X to Y sperm.

In fact, extended abstinence may negatively impact sperm motility (movement) and morphology (shape), which are critical factors for successful fertilisation. Optimal sperm motility has been observed with shorter abstinence periods, typically less than three days. Given the current scientific evidence, abstaining from sex for three to four days does not increase the proportion of male sperm or the likelihood of conceiving a boy or girl. Couples aiming to conceive are generally advised to have regular intercourse during the woman's fertile window, regardless of desired baby gender. This approach maximises the chances of conception.”

Verdict: 

Unfounded. You can still experiment even though there is no proven outcome, but note that frequent ejaculation is generally better for sperm quality and motility.

Theory #3: Deeply penetrative sex positions will increase your chances of having a boy

Parents say: 

This is a saucy one. Isabelle Khang, 30, an HR generalist with a one-year-old girl shares: “I heard that sexual positions can determine the baby’s gender. Deep penetration will give you a boy, and going shallow will get you a girl.” Rear entry, doggy-style and side-lying are some deeply penetrative positions believed to help conceive a boy. Conversely, taking the good ol’ missionary position, spooning or woman-on-top is believed to help conceive a girl. 

Experts say: 

Dr Nair explains: “The notion that specific sexual positions can influence the sex of a baby is another component of the Shettles method. This is based on the hypothesis that male (Y chromosome) sperm are faster swimmers and benefit from a shorter journey to the egg, and that female (X chromosome) sperm are more resilient and can survive longer in the reproductive tract, giving them an advantage over time. However, contemporary scientific research does not support the effectiveness of sexual positions in determining a baby's sex.”

Dr Martha Tara Lee, relationship counsellor and clinical sexologist at Eros Coaching, adds: “While deep penetration may help sperm reach the cervix more easily, gender determination depends solely on which sperm fertilises the egg. Couples may try different positions if they find it fun, but this is not a reliable method.”

Verdict: 

Another unproven hypothesis, but this one can be titillating to try!

Theory #4: Eat more meat to get a boy; eat more veggies to get a girl

Parents say: 

Isabelle says: “Eat more meat to get a boy; eat more veggies to get a girl. I’m quite sure I have a girl because I eat a lot of veggies,” she laughs. Kristian, 32, an assistant director with a one-year-old girl chimes in: “I heard that the guy should eat more meat to get a boy, and more vegetables to get a girl!” 

Dietary recommendations to influence your baby’s gender can be both confusing and conflicting. Proponents of the vaginal pH theory would recommend the exact opposite, saying that you should eat more meat, eggs and dairy for an acidic diet to conceive a girl, and more fruits and vegetables for an alkaline diet to conceive a boy. (See point #5 below.) 

Experts say: 

“While some studies have explored potential links between maternal diet and the sex of their offspring, any evidence remains inconclusive,” states Dr Nair.

“A 2008 study suggested that women with higher caloric intake around conception, including regular consumption of breakfast cereals, were slightly more likely to have male babies. Specifically, 56 per cent of women in the highest energy intake group had sons, compared to 45 per cent in the lowest energy intake group. However, this study did not specifically link meat consumption to conceiving boys or vegetable consumption to conceiving girls. It's also important to note that subsequent analyses, including evaluations by the UK's National Health Service, have critiqued these findings, suggesting that the evidence is not strong enough to recommend dietary changes for influencing baby gender.”

Dr Lee adds: “While the man’s diet influences sperm quality, it does not determine the sex of the baby. Still, eating a balanced diet with antioxidants and essential nutrients can improve sperm health, which helps overall fertility. Couples can consider this approach as part of their lifestyle improvement.”

Verdict: 

This one’s busted.

Theory #5: Eat more alkaline foods to get a boy

Parents say: 

“I read a study that said vaginal pH levels affect the gender of your baby. Supposedly eating more sodium and potassium will get you a boy, and taking more calcium and magnesium will get you a girl. This seems to track because I love my salty food, eat a lot of fruit and vegetables, and almost never have dairy. Is that why I have two boys?” Charlotte muses.

Experts say: 

Dr Janice Tung, accredited IVF specialist and consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist at Thomson Fertility Centre says: “This belief remains speculative and lacks strong scientific evidence. Theories suggesting that diet can alter vaginal pH levels to favour male or female sperm, such as how calcium and magnesium are thought to create a more favourable environment to conceive a girl, while potassium and sodium might support an alkaline environment to conceive a boy, are inconclusive.”

Dr Nair adds: “Ultimately, couples aiming to conceive are best advised to focus on maintaining a balanced diet and a healthy lifestyle, rather than relying on unproven strategies to sway the odds of having a boy or a girl.”

Verdict: 

Another unproven hypothesis, but it will benefit you to load up on important minerals!

Theory #6: Ensure female orgasm to increase the chance of conceiving a boy

Parents say: 

Another saucy one. Andrea, 39, a stay-home mum with three boys aged 3, 6 and 9, says, “I read that having an orgasm right before he does will help make a baby boy, and we tried to do that. But even when we didn’t do it, we also got a boy. We have three boys!” The same belief claims that the woman should abstain from having an orgasm during intercourse when trying for a girl.

Experts say: 

Dr Tung: “Female orgasms can create a more alkaline vaginal environment, which may favour male sperm. However, the impact of this on gender selection is not definitively proven. Skipping female orgasms conversely might help create a less alkaline environment, which some believe could favour female sperm. Again, the scientific basis for this is inconclusive.”

Clinical sexologist Dr Lee weighs in: “The notion that avoiding orgasms favours X-sperm is unproven. Pleasure should be a key part of intimacy, and there is no evidence linking female orgasms to baby gender. Couples should focus on mutual satisfaction instead.”

Verdict: 

Another unproven hypothesis, and this one seems slightly unfair to the fairer sex!

Theory #7: Try to conceive from March to May if you want a girl; September to November if you want a boy

Parents say:

“It sounds a little farfetched but I’ve also heard that you should try during March to May if you want a girl, and during September to November if you want a boy,” Andrea adds. “We didn’t try this because we didn’t exactly have to wait that long... so I can’t say if it works.”

Experts say:

“This belief has been explored in scientific studies, but the evidence remains inconclusive,” Dr Nair explains. “A study conducted in Modena, Italy, analysed over 14,000 births and found a higher proportion of male conceptions in autumn (September to November) and a higher proportion of female conceptions in spring (March to May). The researchers suggested that environmental factors, such as temperature and daylight variations, might influence the reproductive system, potentially affecting the sex ratio at conception. 

Despite these findings, the variations in sex ratios are relatively small, and the underlying mechanisms remain unclear. Factors such as geographic location, climate, and cultural practices may also play a role, making it challenging to draw definitive conclusions. In summary, while some studies suggest a slight seasonal variation in the sex ratio at birth, the evidence is not strong enough to recommend specific conception timing to influence a baby's gender.”

Dr Nair advises: “Couples aiming to conceive are best advised to focus on overall reproductive health and well-being rather than relying on seasonal timing as a method for gender selection.”

Dr Tung aptly points out: “The fact that there are two opposing theories favouring either sex generally means the chances of naturally conceiving a boy or girl remain approximately 50-50. While these methods can add an element of fun to the process, science has not confirmed a guaranteed way to influence a baby’s gender naturally. In some cases, these methods may even decrease your overall chances of conception by limiting the frequency of intercourse during the ovulation and fertile window.”

Verdict: 

Inconclusive. You shouldn’t wait for that small window to try!

Conclusion: Nothing's proven – try at your own risk

The idea of being able to influence your baby’s gender may seem appealing, especially if you have certain gender preferences. But it’s important to note that none of the theories above have been proven. In this regard, it would be wiser to do what you can to improve your fertility health, and let nature take its course.

“Trying for a baby is a deeply personal journey,” says Dr Janice Tung. “Whether you’re hoping for a boy or a girl, the most important thing is to stay positive and enjoy the process. Every child is a blessing and a unique addition to your family.”

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