Here's How You Can Turn Worry And Anxiety Into Your Superpower
If stress or worry is preventing you from living a fulfilled life, you’re not alone. Here's advice from clinical psychologist Dr Jodie Lowinger - plus where to find help in Singapore.
If you feel more anxious nowadays, you are not alone. The Singapore Association for mental health (SAHM) has seen an 80 percent increase in people who required counscelling for anxiety, compared with the same period last year.
Dr Jodie Lowinger is a clinical psychologist and founder of the Anxiety Clinic. As she explains. "Anxiety itself is very much a part of our common human experience. It’s the result of living in this uncertain, ever-changing world – a result of being human."
The difference is the level of anxiety you feel. Some of the people visiting the SAMH Insight Centre for counselling in Singapore had become overwhelmed by anxiety. They noticed changes to their eating or sleeping patterns. Some had trouble focusing or concentrating,
Dr Lowinger explains that anxiety isn’t a flaw or a weakness. You don't have to be ashamed if you feel this way. "We need to let go of ideas about anxiety meaning you are ‘not good enough’. In fact, anxiety can be a superpower. This is because the majority of people who struggle with anxiety have a depth of thinking and a rare depth of feeling – a strong, analytical mind combined with an empathic heart." Here, she shares her tips for dealing with anxiety;
Dr Jodie explains that in primitive times we needed anxiety. If humans encountered danger, such as a tiger in our midst, the stress reaction was triggered. We were primed to run away, hide, or to fight to protect ourselves against the life-threatening situation. This protective mechanism is still hard-wired in us. The problem is the fight or flight reaction is also triggered by a perceived threat – a worry thought. Worry triggers a surge of adrenaline and cortisol in your bloodstream.
You may breathe more quickly, your heart may pound, or you may feel sick or lightheaded. You may get “butterflies” in your stomach as the blood rushes out of your stomach towards your arms and legs. But rather than fighting a real threat, you are fighting against the bully in your mind that alerts you to bad things that might happen in the future.
Anxiety can be a critically important friend in times of need. You don’t want to hate anxiety. You want to understand it, respect it, and leverage it at times when it keeps you fired up, alert and responding effectively. Ultimately, the purpose of anxiety is to help you to pay attention and to provide the energy to act.
For example, you might feel anxious when you are finalising a work project. Once the task is completed, the anxiety disappears. So anxiety can be good in that it can help you get things done.
What tips anxiety into overdrive is your mindset – whether you focus on your perceived threats or you focus on your goals. For example, maybe you have anxiety about your health? Instead of worrying about something bad happening, it can help to shift your focus towards problem-solvi. what can you do to maintain a balanced and healthy lifestyle?
In a business setting, it can help to shift from worrying about the possible things that may go wrong in the future towards identifying the business’s strategic direction. What can you do to get the team working on organisational values and goals?
Worry will scream and shout in order to catch your attention. Worry also has imagination. It will conjure up images and scripts about all the possible things that might go wrong. However, worry and rumination are illusions of control and protection – they just get you focused on the negatives.
So think of them like a snowball rolling down a mountain gathering more snow... it just gets bigger and bigger! So worry just ends up leading to… more worry. Next time you get caught up in a cycle of worry, stop and consider whether your thoughts are helpful or unhelpful? This way, you start to loosen your belief that worry and rumination can help you. It is a large step on the path to not letting them have the same power over you as they had before.
Have a think about the last time worry was bossing you around. What story was it telling you? If that story was a book, what title would you give it? For example: Was it the ‘I’m Not Good Enough’ story, the ‘I’m an Imposter’ one or maybe the ‘Something Bad Will Happen’ tale?
You often get stuck in these stories at 2am when all you want to do is sleep. Don't both arguing with the story. Just think of worry as a bully. Don't give it the attention it’s demanding. Gently close the book, take a deep breath and get on with your day.
Turn your attention back towards the things that you want to do, not the things worry is telling you to do.
Once you know what worry looks and sounds like, note down the worry thoughts as they arise in a journal or notes app on your phone – what is worry telling you? By noting down the worry thoughts as they arise you can get distance from the content of thoughts and stop them from spiraling out of control.
Then, at a specific time each day, spend 15 to 20 minutes only attending to your list. Remove items that are no longer relevant. For example, you might have been worrying about a disagreement you had with a family member and later that day the two of you had lunch and got on fine. No need to dwell on something that’s resolved – delete!
Practise mindfulness strategies to let go of items that are out of your control. For these thoughts, it is helpful to engage in strategies that assist in letting go of worry. This one works well: visualise a leaf floating down a stream. Wrap your worry thought in a bundle, place it on the leaf, and let it float away – it can even go all the way down a waterfall.
Where to get help for anxiety in Singapore
• National Care Hotline: 1800-202-6868 (8am – 12am)
Mental well-being
• Institute of Mental Health’s Mental Health Helpline: 6389-2222 (24 hours)
• Samaritans of Singapore: 1800-221-4444 (24 hours) /1-767 (24 hours)
• Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-283-7019
• Silver Ribbon Singapore: 6386-1928
• Tinkle Friend: 1800-274-4788 and www.tinklefriend.sg
• Community Health Assessment Team: 6493-6500/1 and www.chat.mentalhealth.sg
Counselling
• TOUCHline (Counselling): 1800-377-2252
• TOUCH Care Line (for seniors, caregivers): 6804-6555
• Care Corner Counselling Centre: 1800-353-5800
Online resources
• mindline.sg
• My Mental Health: stayprepared.sg/mymentalhealth
• Fei Yue’s Online Counselling Service: eC2.sg
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Additional Reporting by Tara Barker, March 2022