Drea Chong Gets Real About Why Mums Just Don't Hang Out Anymore
"Story of my life," says one fellow mum
By Michelle Lee SM -
Mums, especially ones with young kids, who have found themselves lamenting their lack of social life, you're not alone. Singapore influencer and entrepreneur Drea Chong has succinctly addressed the reason why mums just don't socialise anymore. The 32-year-old, has two sons, Ezra, who's nearly three, and Elia, one, with her husband Imran Rahim.
The truth, for most mums, is just that it's so hard to find the right time to meet friends who don't have kids, or even those with children, for that matter.
In the Instagram post, she says, "You can't hang out with single friends because they don't want to hang out with you from 7am to 9am. You can't hang out with single friends from 12pm to 2pm because that's nap time. And you can't hang out with them from 7pm to 9pm because that's your kid's bedtime."
And bringing the kids along isn't quite the option, because, according to Drea, "On the weekend, they'd rather go to CruCycle than go to Botanic Gardens with your kids."
So... what about fellow mums? Turns out, it's not that easy, too.
She continued, "Now that the single friends are out of the picture, let's talk about mums. Hanging out on the weekdays is just a no because, by the time we get home from work, we're so tired. And probably one of our kids is having a sleep regression."
As for the weekends, she adds, they're also taken up by birthday parties, time with the grandparents, swimming classes, and Berries (Mandarin language enrichment classes).
"And then you also need to coordinate which mum friend you want to hang out with. Like if you find a family that you really like, do you meet every week? Is that too much? If you have two kids, you need to hang out with the two kids' families. The one-kid families have their lives in order, so do you hang out with the one-kid family or the two-kid family?
She concluded, "So that's it. I'm just going to hang out with my sons until they turn 15 and they don't want me anymore, and then that's it."
Her post saw plenty of acknowledgment from fellow mums and followers, with comments like, "I feel so seen!", and "Story of my life".
If you're grappling with how your social life has atrophied after having kids, just know that it's not just you. We got nine mums to share how their outlook on friendships has changed since embarking on their motherhood journey.